Another adult monster: The Niff-Retcher.
If you were to see the Niff-retcher, you might mistaken it for a bizarrely designed brick laying machine.
But
be not mistaken. This is an adult monster and it is keeping you from your comfy mattress!
This creature is a giant head with a long tube for a nose. The nose is a mix between an elephant's trunk and a vacuum cleaner hose. It does not suck up oxygen, but time.
It inhales precious minutes and seconds from you, as you are near your destination at the end of a long day - when you just want to collapse on your bed or sit in your comfy chair.
But no matter how many steps your tired legs may take, and how quickly
the seconds seem to fly by, you will not reach your destination any time soon.
For each precious moment that would bring you one step closer to your sweet relief - now devoured by the Niff-retcher- is converted into one step worth of ground! Ground that is vomited out from its impossibly large mouth, permanently set in a wide mocking grin, and placed on your intended route home.
All performed by this diabolical fiend... NIFF-RETCHER!
How to beat it:
A Niff-retcher feeds only on small increments of time, otherwise its tube gets clogged.
So, in order to stop up it's hose: one must fill a minute or a second with an hours worth of weight, thought and care.
If you find yourself eagerly counting the seconds before reaching your destination; try reflecting, instead, on the heavy impact that these seemingly little moments have on your life overall. Appreciate them for more than a moment in between life. See them as a part of life.
This is life.
With any luck, these few moments of protracted perspective will choke the annoying vermin, long enough for you to escape.
Also: listening to modern music helps, as Niff-retchers have notoriously snobbish views on anything composed after the baroque period.
Sleep well, weary traveler.
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