A young man looking to feed his fix approaches the man on the street. He has exactly what the young man is looking for ...DEALER: I got exactly what you're looking for, son. But let's narrow it down, kay? Kay.
What's your flavour? Liberica? Arabica? Robusta? ... Excelsa ...?! Alright: fine grind; course grind?
I know you don't want no instant - GTFO of here with that, you see that pimp 'round the corner for that Maxwell house no name brand bull shit! He still gonna cut it with tea leaves and dirt too, just cause he can
... Now what particular party we talking? Mocha, Chai, Frap, latte, Americano, basic drip or were you thinking a a red eye? Espresso shots? Uno, dos, tres?
What you take it with? We got low fat, all skim, homo, 1, 2, 10, 18%.
What's that?
(Laughs)
Ch'yea we got soy, if you got money. Now make an order, cuz I don't got all day!
- Written en route to an audition for the part of a drug dealer specializing in coffee. No sides were provided but I thought I'd prepare something.
Special thanks to the subway car of people who gave me a LOT of space while repeatedly said "Liberica, Arabica, Robusta, Excelsa" over and over and over. Really lent me some authenticity.
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