Day 216

It's hard to be openhearted and optimistic when talking about politics.
Especially when in conversation with people with opposite views.
It tends towards debate. Debate towards argument. Argument to fighting.
And the point of a fight is to win. Because we need there to be a winner. Even though we're all playing for the same team really.
But maybe that's why I've failed to engage.
It feels burdensome. A chain around the neck of the adult human. To be informed enough, so that you know there isn't a secret coup going on; while not being so informed you become CONVINCED there is a secret coup going on.
So what do I want to feel, when I think on politics and conversation.
Something like this: wow.
Everything is happening. All around. In real time. And I get to have a say in how it does!
We have a genuine opportunity to shape the world in which we live, and the world that we will leave behind?!
Let's do that! You and me, stranger. Let's decide, together what is important. Let's shape our world!
That kind of makes me want to vomit cotton candy.
But I hope I'm making myself clear: I want to be excited by the things that make me groan.
I want to want a better world, more than I want to avoid mud slinging.
And I'm impatient, because I want to make big changes now, to make up for all the little change I didn't make before yesterday.
So be patient with me, I don't really know what I'm doing.